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Choose You

Sometimes we’re so afraid of losing the people we love that we’ll cut off pieces of ourselves to keep them. We’ll change things about ourselves. Switch that up or switch this up. Or take on this habit or that one. Or you refuse to talk about your dreams around them as not to further minimize their existence knowing full well they lack the vision, the direction, the will or the self-determination to do any more than what they are currently doing. We’ll dim our light as not to outshine them just to keep their light on.


I get it, it’s comfort in the familiar. You know exactly how to perform and exist in that setting. You know what or what not to say (which is not being authentic to yourself, your Spirit or your God). You’re smothering, choking out, drowning you.

Chile, the more you smother away, choke out, silence and drown yourself to be around or coexist with them...the less they will love, like or respect you. On the for real, for real…they know your worth.

Here’s the deal......you’re not only messing yourself up, you’re messing them up too. You're assuming they don't have what it takes to love someone completely (they do and it’s just not you), or you’re assuming they don’t know how to and your sticking around will somehow show them, teach them, bait them. Or you have this warped Savior fix it complex which has really become the only way you now validate your existence (which is another level of insecurity).]


Why? Because you no longer know who you are. You no longer know your voice. You’ve become familiar with justifying and validating existence. And it’s just that...existence. Day in, day out. Day in, day out.

Either way....it’s all a farce. And it’s draining you of doing exactly what God needs you to do. As a Spirit, God manifested specific energy in you to come to the earth for a specific purpose. You were fearfully and wonderfully made....in His image. And I don’t recall any Bible story where God reduced Himself down, dumbed Himself down or dimmed His light for anyone. HE IS light! And SO ARE YOU!


So....ALWAYS choose you. Choose the path that God has set for you. Sometimes it includes an exit plan.


Free you mind…..and the BEST will follow


Ladies, I know some of you are dealing with this and may be stuck in your emotions right now. I’m about to free you up:


No longer focus on the fact that he cheated on you. Chile, let that go. Focus on the blessing and release in it. Forgive and move on. You likely had evolved beyond him anyway or he was never really worthy to begin with. He could no longer keep up with who you had become and wallowing with the chickens (or chicken heads) is so much easier than growth. Not everyone is spiritually or mentally equipped to elevate. Not your fault.


And I’m certain you are bearing some of the blame of his behavior, huh? At least that’s what he said, right? A bunch of what you did or didn’t do, yes?? Girl listen....while you are a powerful being, you are not powerful enough to drive somebody to sin. That is between him, the enemy with his lying, tricky self and God. It has nothing to do with you!! Get that!! Let me say it again....it has Nothing, Nathan, Nathaniel to do with you.


Choose love. And by all means, don’t give up on it. Believe in it, expect it, welcome it and embrace it. Allow restoration to come to you. It’s the law of the Universe....it has to come back to you. Sevenfold. Sweetie, it will literally chase you down once you release the emotions you have tied up in what that other joker did. Look at it this way....if the joker hadn’t have cheated, would you have realized that he was never really what God had for you to begin with?! 🤷🏽‍♀️ Or perhaps he was....but just for a season. But baby, that season is over. God has more purpose for you and he would have only distracted you from doing what God has called you to do. The blessings that are about to overtake you were never intended for him. No need in trying to hold on or even tie yourself up in anger, bitterness, hurt or unforgiveness. You’re too precious for that. Bitterness doesn’t look good either, it isn’t cute and it ages you. You are indeed beautiful and whole and worthy. You are entitled to love. Now move yourself out of the way, so Love can do for you and get to you what you deserve. Love does indeed cover a multitude of sins, even the ones against you.


JNicole Speaks

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