Sometimes we’re so afraid of losing the people we love that we’ll cut off pieces of ourselves to keep them. We’ll change things about ourselves. Switch that up or switch this up. Or take on this habit or that one. Or you refuse to talk about your dreams around them as not to further minimize their existence knowing full well they lack the vision, the direction, the will or the self-determination to do any more than what they are currently doing. We’ll dim our light as not to outshine them just to keep their light on.
I get it, it’s comfort in the familiar. You know exactly how to perform and exist in that setting. You know what or what not to say (which is not being authentic to yourself, your Spirit or your God). You’re smothering, choking out, drowning you.
Chile, the more you smother away, choke out, silence and drown yourself to be around or coexist with them...the less they will love, like or respect you. On the for real, for real…they know your worth.
Here’s the deal......you’re not only messing yourself up, you’re messing them up too. You're assuming they don't have what it takes to love someone completely (they do and it’s just not you), or you’re assuming they don’t know how to and your sticking around will somehow show them, teach them, bait them. Or you have this warped Savior fix it complex which has really become the only way you now validate your existence (which is another level of insecurity).]
Why? Because you no longer know who you are. You no longer know your voice. You’ve become familiar with justifying and validating existence. And it’s just that...existence. Day in, day out. Day in, day out.
Either way....it’s all a farce. And it’s draining you of doing exactly what God needs you to do. As a Spirit, God manifested specific energy in you to come to the earth for a specific purpose. You were fearfully and wonderfully made....in His image. And I don’t recall any Bible story where God reduced Himself down, dumbed Himself down or dimmed His light for anyone. HE IS light! And SO ARE YOU!
So....ALWAYS choose you. Choose the path that God has set for you. Sometimes it includes an exit plan.